But first of all, a note about a sweet little nurse. Aidan is sleeping on the blow up mattress in the living room. He drifted off with Chloe holding his hand and singing a lullaby. She bedded down on the couch next to him so that she could be near if he needed anything, eagerly hopping up everytime he needs a drink. She cheerfully endured 5 hours in the waiting room this morning and didn't get at all irritated when her big brother responded in a cranky manner as she fed him crackers in the car. She may have found her calling. All big brothers should be so blessed to have a such a little sis like this one.
The other side doesn't seem so scary. When you come to the part past that really hard thing; it would be easy to forget why you were stressed in the first place. It would be easy to shove the whole pile of turmoil under the relief. But remembering brings a whole new gift with it. It reminds me of the friends who carried my burdens and were brave for me when I wasn't able to be brave on my own. Who guarded my heart with me when I was fighting my own inner turmoil. Friends who stayed up late, and woke up early, thinking and praying for my boy, and his momma. Who fed us and loved on us. Neighbors who picked up our milk, and took out our trash, because I forgot.
And I hope that the next time I hear of somebody who is freaked out about something, I will not think they need to be braver or stronger or tougher. I hope I will remember how not brave, not strong, and not tough I was, and give the same compassion and grace that I have been given. And I'll remember how it felt to not be alone, and I'll give my hand for somebody else to hold.